.i.n.k,m,i.n.k.

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Click this sentence to get a free mediafire download of my new song, “Mythical Bobwhite Exists”.

I am getting ready to leave Beaver, OK for a couple of weeks. I’ll be back, but I felt like I needed to memorialize a few things about the last three weeks: my first field study, my first successful pitfall trapping events, and most importantly my first (an event that has now become boring) northern bobwhite sightings. I would joke to anyone that would listen that I had only ever seen one in the zoo, yet here we were working on a grant aimed at preserving their dwindling numbers. Well now I’ve seen several, can recognize their calls, and despite all of that have still not lost the ability to scream childishly when I accidentally flush them from their hiding spots.

So here’s to you, mythical bobwhite. You do exist!

(via mygoldengirls, newyearskiss)

Of course I can’t sleep. There’s a GOLDEN GIRLS MARATHON ON!

now would

Now would be a good time to have someone to share a life with. I’m so uncertain about everything right now and am also sick as a dog. I just want you (the Queen’s you) to hold me.

~~POSER~~

I know I said I was thinking of stopping making music. But being in Beaver, surrounded by the things with which I am most in love, has given me a second wind. Maybe. I am making really indulgent, bratty versions of old songs while also trying to write new ones that I love. I’m afraid they’ll be hated and that I will alienate anyone that liked my music (because in a way I feel like I have forsaken everything I used to have on the East Coast, including friendships). I am documenting this process through art.

An ant bit me today. I get to empty the first of my pitfall traps tomorrow. One day down, thirty-four more to go - not to mention all the grasshopper sampling left to do. I encountered my first lubber grasshopper today. It was a nymphal Brachystola magna (do yourself a favor and google it). Being an east-coast-orthopterist, I have only ever read about lubbers (big, more-or-less flightless grasshoppers). And today I got to handle one. I also tracked down a fairly convincing ID of certain large Oedipodinid individuals that were very difficult to place: Xanthippus corallipes pantherinus. Absolutely beautiful. Beaver, Oklahoma, is going to spoil me. I am encountering the creatures I am most fascinated with on a regular basis and am forever in awe.

(David Wojnarowicz)

“I’m going to lose.”

SOON

A few re-imaginations of older songs to celebrate nothing.

I haven’t done this in a long time.

I haven’t made music in a long time. I haven’t felt the desire. Graduate school is taking up the right amount of time, frankly - I am relieved I haven’t been able to work on music because to me that feels like I am doing something right.

That being said, I just spent twenty minutes crying in my office repeating (among other things), “I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t know how to be a person. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I don’t know why I’m here.”

And through it all I thought about how fucking laborious writing those feelings down or getting them out musically would be. I think I’m starting to grow out of making music.

I will try.

julieklausner:

Here is a recent photo of Sean Young out in public for your reference.

DOWNLOAD “CNTRT” HERE BY CLICKING THIS SENTENCE - IT’S FREE

Because I should be asleep or studying, I decided that I would finish putting this single together. Originally intended to be an EP, “CNTRT” has become a single or maybe just a mini-EP.

I tried to work on writing two more songs for it (as was the original idea), but I came up short - short of time and short of ideas. I have half of another song done, which will probably come out as one track for the follow-up mini-EP entitled “OIE”.

The first track is called “Honest Milk Snake” - a standard inkmink affair with some noisier whispers echoing in the same old hollow shell that is this planet (whoa - take it easy). The title is also an anagram. The second track is called “Penance for What?”. Similarly noisy, frantic sounds like thoughts play off of one another until one rings louder than the others. Then it becomes all you hear. And then that’s it.

I took the cover photo. I made all of the sounds. Enjoy this and please share!

Right now I can either hear a cow or a chainsaw. This is where I live.

but that chicken’s worth the pain